


A Pirate's Life

by SonglordsBug



Series: Skull and Crossbones [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen, Headcanon, Hydra (Marvel), I Believe in Jasper Sitwell, and all the rest of them - Freeform, but none of the main characters are willing, darcy adopts herself a pirate crew
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 18:01:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17146457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SonglordsBug/pseuds/SonglordsBug
Summary: While Hydra is imploding after Winter Soldier, they get their hands on Jane and Darcy. They weren't expecting Darcy to subvert supposedly loyal agents under their noses, nor for her to adopt a pirate crew. Their mistake.





	A Pirate's Life

**Author's Note:**

> crossposting from stumblr

What if Darcy wasn’t able to get Jane away?

Hydra comes out of the shadows, Shield implodes, Thor and Selvig are somewhere, and Hydra comes for Jane. Darcy manages to get taken along and talks them into training her, or they’ve already ‘recruited’ her as discussed previously. But now Darcy has the Jane handicap.

Somehow she convinces her storm-chasing crazy-person scientist to at least pretend to cooperate. Jane is convincing enough that they give her a lab. But she has a lab partner.

See, at some point Hydra approached general Ross and appealed to his alarmist, paranoid, stupidity. I don’t know if he joins them or what, though it certainly seems to me like they would have things in common. But somehow, they get Betty, who was in her father’s 'custody’.

(Let’s be real, she was awesome enough to go for what she wanted, and she chose Bruce, there has to be reason she didn’t hunt him down the second time.) So Betty’s been stuck in a Hydra lab somewhere. And then she ends up lab partners with Jane, and it doesn’t take Darcy long to adopt her as well.

She meets Rumlow, and he’s charmed by her snark and sass and they proceed to do the dancing around each other as they try to figure out where the other stands on the true-believer of Hydra scale.

Then Darcy and Sitwell run into each other and have their 'what are you doing here’ moment. They figure out that neither actually wants to be Hydra, and then they bring Rumlow in. Then Darcy mentions that she’s got two scientists.

There are now five of them in one Hydra base, which isn’t actually enough to do anything, but at least they have company and are able to form a pack-like structure for Rumlow. (They all get really good at providing the physical contact he needs. And seeing the little tiny scientist ladies boss him around is hilarious.)

At some point they find out that Hydra is calling Rumlow Crossbones, and then since Darcy hangs around him, Hydra starts calling her Skull. This amuses Darcy who argues that they should all have pirate related codenames. She proposes Privateer for Jasper, who scowls and rolls his eyes, but doesn’t actually argue.

Betty looks thoughtful and then asks if she can be Kraken. At the looks this earns her she mentions that she’s been stuck in this shitty little Hydra lab for years thanks to her father, and her ex-boyfriend turns into a giant green rage-monster.

Jane ignores the whole conversation, so Darcy dubs her their Ship. Four days later Jane notices and starts threatening to stab them with a screwdriver every time they call her that.

At some point they get rescued, or actually, they rescue themselves and then run into Coulson’s team and the Avengers. Neither of which group has any idea what to do  with this group of crazy people.


End file.
